Easing the mind
Communication
We're often concerned about how to express our thoughts
and feelings when a loved one is dying. We worry about saying
the "right things." It is normal to feel sad, helpless or awkward.
Relating to your loved one honestly and authentically affirms
your bond and reassures them that they are not alone.
Here are some helpful guidelines if you find yourself
struggling with what to say or how to say it:
When words fail, be assured that your presence alone can be
meaningful and reassuring.
Touch is a pure form of communication. Hold their hand,
gently stroke their forehead or massage their hands and feet.
Speak directly to your loved one.
Avoid talking about them to others in the room.
If your loved one wants to talk about death, listen actively.
Resist the urge to change the subject to "cheer them up."
Allow deeper conversations. People who are dying want to
know that their lives have meaning. Ask them to share
their favorite memories and then share yours.
If they are reluctant to share their feelings because of
denial or a wish to protect other loved ones, suggest that
they speak with a chaplain or counselor.
Even if your loved one's eyes are closed and they are
unresponsive, know that your loved one can likely hear
your words.
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